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But the love of other people is directional. And real love is not only about the feelings of the lover; it is not egotism. It is when one person believes in another person and shows it.
In Fiddler on the Roof , when Tevye asks Golde whether she loves him after a quarter century of marriage, her wry answer is exactly on point:. Of course it is possible to perform all sorts of duties for someone and feel little or nothing for them. Love is not about being hired help.
Love is not an obligation done with a cold soul. But neither is it a passion that expresses itself in cruelty, or one that does not express itself at all.
The feeling must be wedded to the deed. We would have a healthier conception of love if we understood that love, like parenting or friendship, is a feeling that expresses itself in action.
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